Seeing the tealette avert his gaze from him and request to be let go, Natsuki’s heart clenched with hurt. He really didn’t mean it then? So he really didn’t? How foolish of him. The blonde’s grip on Aine loosened as he felt a wave of heart break wash over his entire being. He couldn’t breathe; he couldn’t move. It was almost Deja Vu, this feeling.
He felt his eyes well over with the moisture that dwelled in his emerald orbs. And gentle tears dropped from his cheeks and onto Aine as he stared blankly at him.
The tealette jerked his gaze away to avoid him, and Natsuki couldn’t do anything but stare.
I… I do love you, Natsuki…
He did? His broken emeralds lit up with light hope hearing these words and he stared at Aine with desperate need to have this overwhelming desire to be wanted fulfilled.
I loved you ever since I started to trust you…
Natsuki felt his heart beat for the first time in moments, even minutes. And he took in his first breathe since Aine’s averting gaze. He did love him? He could feel his eyes warm up slightly as well as his mouth as it locked up in attempt to smile but couldn’t. Just as he was warming back up and had since wiped the broken tears that had escaped from his warm emeralds, Aine had pushed himself from Natsuki.
The blonde was sent falling backward slightly but caught himself and brought his gloomily, confused gaze over to the small tealette who now stood a few feet from him.
But if all I can do is cause you pain and sadness, Natsuki, I don’t deserve your love.
Natsuki’s heart clenched again and he took in a sharp breathe as this sensation washed over him. He could feel his pooling tears well up to over flow again…. but he did love him right? He just said so…. The blonde couldn’t let that happy, warm feeling of belonging and wholeness go by allowing Aine to just run. As this thought processed through his mind, Aine turned and fled.
In attempt to stop him, Natsuki stood half way and reached his arm out for him, “Aine-chan, wait!“ he called out loudly, staring off at the disapearing figure that scurried into the distance.
"Wait….” he trailed off, still staring.
He had to follow. Something deep within his core told him to run after Aine even if it hurt; even if it meant denial. Standing upright, Natsuki finished cleaning his soaked cheeks from the residue of his tears before sprinting off after the tealette.
I have to tell him why… He has to know why.
“All I can do is hurt him.”
“So if I stay away… Natsuki can smile again.”
The rush of air pounded against his lungs as the teal-haired idol ran as fast he could to wherever his legs could take him.
“I can’t be with him…”
The thoughts ached through his soul, and tears brimmed his eyes. In the end, it would never work out. Even overcoming his fear of falling in love, what good would it do if Natsuki only gets hurt?
He paused around the corridor to catch his breath; his aching lungs ready to explode. He was far enough from his beloved; enough where he could think. Aine blinked, realizing something important.
Tears were streaming down his face… was he crying? Holding out his hand, Aine caught one droplet into his palm, noticeably shaking. His heart was hurting so much. These feelings of love were honest, completely pure and honest. Natsuki knew them now, and Aine knew his back.
Then why…?
Why did I run…?
“Even if we love each other…” he choked a sob, covering his face, “If all I can do is run and break his heart… he can’t love a horrible person like me. He just can’t…!”
Please don’t let him go after me…
“Aine-chan!”
The older male immediately jerked his head up at the call of his name. He gasped when he saw his beloved running towards him, a look of determination written on his face, intent on catching him.
No… not again…!
Aine panicked, and turned tail to run again. He couldn’t let Natsuki catch him. He didn’t want to see Natsuki cry again.
Why was Natsuki still chasing him?
He sprinted down the outdoor halls, trying to lose the pursuing blonde on his heels. His lips gasped for much air; he was reaching the limits of his frail body. Aine glanced behind him, panicking more that the blonde was catching up to him at a tremendous speed. At this rate, Natsuki will catch him…!
Why…?
Taking a sharp turn to avoid the blonde, Aine failed to notice he was going to run down the stairway along his path. He let out a sharp gasp, when he lost his footing, realizing he wasn’t on ground.
His mind froze when he stared down into the ground, time moving slowly as he began to fall.
kisaragi-aine liked this